A chronological expose of a young man’s life living and coping with Asperger’s Syndrome and other diagnoses. Narrated by the protagonist’s mother Angelica and with a Foreword (see below) by Professor Tony Attwood, leader in ASD research:

This story is about a mother’s deep love for her autistic son. As a young child, Edan was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum with some learning difficulties and a natural talent for imagination and drawing. Adel deeply loved her son and ensured he benefited from family and professional support. The prognosis was optimistic during his childhood years as he progressed along the autism spectrum to what used to be described as Asperger’s syndrome. Unfortunately, some autistic adolescents undergo a psychological transformation during or soon after puberty. The pre-teen is making considerable academic and social progress with only minor concerns regarding emotion regulation and management. During puberty, the brain is re-wired to attain cognitive, social, and emotional maturity, and there is a deluge of puberty hormones. However, for some autistic adolescents, during the rewiring and changing hormonal systems, something happens to the emotion regulation system. Anxiety can reach an intensity that is not effectively reduced by cognition, psychological therapies, and medication. The teenager experiences extreme distress that they, their parents, and professionals feel is out of control. The autistic teenager has a catastrophic emotional reaction to specific experiences, such as particular sounds, being offended, perceived injustice and uncertainty. There is a release of powerful emotional energy that is quite frightening for parents and the autistic person themselves. The destructive behaviour is a means of expressing and discharging the intensity of the agitation and acts as a temporary ‘reset’ button. Autistic adolescents can also experience considerable distress in seeking but not achieving social connections and feeling like they are an alien in a hostile world. A coping mechanism for social isolation is to create and escape into an alternative imaginary world over which you have control and can experience social success. They must also cope with new body sensations and FOREWORD viii ogwadabwah! sexuality without an understanding of the complex social codes associated with expressing sexuality. Autism in adolescence can then become ‘autism plus’, with recognition of additional mental disorders such as an anxiety disorder, especially obsessivecompulsive disorder, depression and self-harm, and a personality disorder. The clinical profile changes, and parents feel they are losing their connection with their autistic son or daughter, who is deeply distressed and agitated. Behaviours may emerge that do not seem to respond to sedative medication or cognitive behaviour therapy, and the police and residential psychiatric services are often involved in supporting and protecting the autistic adolescent, their family, and the community. As Edan went through traumatic autistic adolescence and experienced the darker side of autism, his mother, Adel (Angelica), was a consistent source of love and support. She had to cope with her son’s extremely disturbed behaviour and the effects of that behaviour on her family. Edan and Adel are the heroes of this story, and they are also my heroes.

Professor Tony Attwood